TBT: The Brutal Truth

Neil Boortz Has A Nightmare

A few days ago, Conservative Garbage Dumpster Neil Boortz went on a wild tangent of blatant class-warfare claiming that if America is faced with an event that threatens lives, everyone should be saved but if there's no time to save everyone, the rich should be saved first. In his words, "this is as it should be."

Neil Boortz claims that saving the rich first is "logical." How so? Because he beleives that it's the rich people who became rich by working hard, that they provide all the jobs, and all the prosperity in America. Logical my ass -- He's WRONG! Neil Boortz is so wrong on so many levels that it's a chore to list them all. Let's really look at this logically -- without the poor and middle class (or as Neil calls them "the great unwashed" and, oh, by the way, Neil, what exactly did you mean by that term? The great unwashed. In what context should that be taken?!? Do you mean "the great unwashed" as in people so poor that they're dirty, have no water, and can't take baths or showers, and probably reek as bad as the garbage you spew over the public airwaves every day ... or do you mean "the great unwashed" as in "Dammit, why couldn't those lazy shiftless Katrina survivors get washed away into the Gulf and drown?!? Jumpin' Jim Jeffords, now they're gonna vote us out and the Democrats in and we'll have socialism galore by the end of the damned decade!!"

If the former, then you've got some explaining to do because Republican conservatives have saying for years that poor people like that don't exist in this country and now you flip-flop and say they do exist by calling them "the great unwashed". Why do you Republican Conservatives always send mixed messages?!? If the latter, then you REALLY got some explaining to do ... like whether or not you wear a sheet while broadcasting your show and use superlatives to mask your racist bigotry such as "other people" or "them kind" -- you know, just like those gun toting Gretna police who masked their racism by telling survivors on the bridge into Jefferson parish, "They be no Superdomes heah!" Seriously, Boortz, we need you to clarify the context there on that whole "the great unwashed" rejoinder.

Oh, yeah -- let's look at this logically: without the poor and middle class, THERE WOULD BE NO RICH PEOPLE AT ALL! NONE! ZEEEEERO! OK? Can you grasp that, Boortz? Without us poor and middle class doing all the menial manual labor at those jobs you say the rich provide, they wouldn't be rich! You claim they got rich by "hard work" NO! They got rich by "hardly working". You follow me?!? I'm dead serious -- rich people got rich by exploitation, not hard work. It doesn't take a lot to exploit people, either. For example, you ever notice something ironic about rich, high-profile, Republican, Conservative Christian Fundamentalist preachers such as Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell, Tony Perkins, Frederick K.C. Price, Lou Sheldon, Rod Parsley ... THEY ARE RICH! Absolutely LOADED! They've got multi-million dollar homes, drive fully loaded Lexuses and Rolls Royce's, have access to the best possible healthcare in this country, their children are attending elegant private schools, and the kicker is they haven't touched a single solitary timeclock in their entire adult life.

These fake, fraudlent, Christians shysters got rich not by working. Although they like to twist Bible scripture and claim they got rich by "following the word of God" and often tell their own perishoners that they can get rich too if they "submit totally to the word of God", it is simply not true. The Bible they wave all the time is clear -- we shall know them by their fruits. Their fruits aren't from the God of the Bible. No, their fruits come from prostating themselves at the feet of the Balaam of Capitalism.

Money.
Mammon.
They serve Mammon..
Mammon Be Thy Master!

They certainly don't serve the Christain God! How come?!? It's right there in the Sermon of the Mount where Jesus told everyone, "Don't go storing up riches here in this world and instead focus on storing up riches in the Kingdom of God - the world to come!" Later on, there was a rich man who came to Jesus and asked him what must he do to become Holy. Jesus told him to follow the Commandments. The rich man told him that he does follow the Commandments. What Jesus said next broke that rich man's heart: sell everything you got, give the money to the poor, and join me. The rich man turned away sad because he was RICH -- he was what President Bush would call a "have-more" -- and he didn't want to sell everything and give up his lifestyle for holy living. Then came the whopper out of Jesus's mouth -- a claim that drives rich people nuts to this very day. Jesus declared, "My, how hard it will be for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of God. I guarantee this truth: It will be easier for a camel to enter the eye of a needle than it will be for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of God".

Did you catch that, Boortz? In other words, what this means is every time Pat Robertson or Oral Roberts claims that they themselves aren't rich or claim to not know anybody who is rich or whenever Halliburton and Bechtel get awarded with another multimillion dollar no-bid government contract, God in heaven turns to Jesus and says to him, "Crimony, you didn't by chance stutter while you were down there, did you boy?!? I'm hip deep in camel innards here! Gimme a hand, Son, we gotta clean this mess up before your Mama comes home or she's gonna have both our asses ... and not over ruining her good sewing needles!"

Exploitation.

It's as simple as that -- rich people get rich by exploitation and that whole Conservative Republican "free market" zealotry those Capitalist pigs and Wall Street screamers keep yammering about is just a convenient cover for it all. The "free market" is just a justification for the exploitation of those in need: "Does the poor man need a job?!? Okay, I'll give you job but you gotta make me richer by accepting my cheap labor, cutting overhead, and maximizing profits ... and if you vote for a candidate that'll give me a tax cut, that would be bonus! I might share it with you ... or I might not! I don't care about your kids, your religion, or nothing about you. All I care about is whether or not you can push product without the overtime."

And that brings me to another thing, Boortz -- you wanna know why places like Target, Meijer, Wal-Mart, McDonalds, nursing homes, and retail stores are constantly in a perpetual state of "always hiring"? It's because they treat their workers like OBJECTS instead of human beings. They treat them like FODDER. They treat their people as EXPENDABLE. It's always some ultimatum from high up -- work extra hours, or get fired. Transfer to the other store to work for the day or get wrote up/fired. Don't make any plans on your day off in case we need you or get wrote up/fired. Do this or get wrote up/fired. Don't do it that way -- do it this way instead even if your way is faster and economical, or get terminated. Don't do certain things in public on your own time because if we see you doing them, you'll get wrote up for fired. Doesn't matter if their unionized or not, places like these are always hiring because their labor force is viewed as EXPENDABLE. When the employer treats the employee as expendable, then the exployee is going to treat their JOB as expendable, resulting in low morale, low company loyalty, high employee theft rates, and that means "always hiring" because THEY CAN'T RETAIN LABOR! Their retention rates suck because they can't keep the labor they've got and so the company is always burning money away -- pissing it away in hiring and training new employees.

It doesn't have to be that way.

But it is.

And it's because of people like you, Neil Boortz, why people like me get hockers on their Whoppers every once in a while and I did nothing to piss them off - I just happened to walk in hungry. Their workers are so digusted because society looks down on menial laborers like burger flippers, checkout lane workers, and elderly care providers as "people who don't have a real job". People are conditioned to think this way because of mouthy, sanctimonious, self-important jackasses like YOU and, as a result of that, those same menial laborers assume that I'm like that by proxy and ... welp ... out comes that hocker. Here comes that terse glare from the checkout lady. Here comes that growl, "It's not my department" from the person wearing the Sears smock that couldn't be bothered to point me in the direction of the toilets.

Who is really a drag on society?

THE RICH!

Predominately the corporate, Republican-owned and operated media in this country. Forget this whole "liberal media" canard that idiots like you Boortz keep spewing. Speaking of which, let's conduct a quick servey here, Neil, because I have a question then been bugging me every since hurricane Katrina took a needle to my own amniotic "shark attack" media bubble: Where did Rupert Murdock and FOX News hide all the missing black people pre-Katrina?!? Seriously, it's gotten to the point now that whenever my TV is tuned to FNC after 9PM and I hear the telltale Swoooosh! GoOnG, I say to the TV, "Ahah, lemme guess -- yet another middle-to-upper-class Catholic/Baptist missing white woman, eh?!?" and, sure as sunrise, there's Greta Van Facelift in a split-screen showing the picture of her as she has been doing for ... oooooh, for about .... damn, I can't remeber the last time a missing black woman broke the monotony on Fox News long enough for Greta to peddle to the couch-potatoes now that I think of it. So, as I said, I would like to really know where exactly did Rupert Murdoch hide all the missing black people before Katrina struck?!?

Same goes for CNN and MSNBC for they like to emulate Fox News because they don't get nowhere near as half as much Schaivo-esque dead-from-the-neck-up couch-potatoes staring all pasty-eyed and gaped-mouthed at their pointless broadcasts of journalistic integrity. Where did they hide all the missing black people, too?!? Somebody has to know over there.

Know what I think? I think they didn't hide them at all. Missing black people have always been around. It's just if FOX, CNN, and MSNBC would've given them airtime, masses of Americans would've e-mail-bombed the station asking, "Who cares about those people?!? Gimme my missing white people! Gimme some rockets and bombs! Gimme me some more shark attacks! Shock and awe my ass into a complacent, all American, red, white and blue, flag-waving, informational defuct, Hagan Daas droolin', inoperable fucking coma, dammit!" And they provide.

Oh, check this out, Boortz -- here's something a reader at Crooks&Liar's.com said about your tangent in their comment section:

According to current statistics, I am wealthy. I was born poor and raised poor and did not begin to accumulate wealth until I was in my 30s (when Bill Clinton was president, BTW). I made some very lucky real estate investments. I'm no genius, believe me. The thing is -- what is it about me as a person that makes me so valuable now that I should be saved, while the earlier version of myself would not to be saved? I'm the same person, with the same beliefs, the same family members (who aren't wealthy). That's very un-American.

And he hit it dead on the stick, Neil.

But before we start soaking the rich, Neil, let's be nice and fire a warning shot. Let's have the poor and middle classes send a clear and present warning to our leaders -- those Outsourced Employees of the Corporatocracy we tend to refer to as "politicians" -- as well as all the rich CEOs of business and industry: Everyone who makes less than $250,000 a year AFTER TAXES -- not gross pay; after taxes -- that listened to your hyperbole the other day Neil should stand up and CALL OFF WORK for a day or two. Stay home, spend some time with the wife and kids if they have them and if they don't, they can spend the day relaxing and do things they always wanted to do but couldn't because they're too busy making someone else rich at their expense.

Damn straight, all the currently employed poor and middle class workers should get up, punch out, and go home or call off for that day. And maybe not just for one day -- how about two days. No, let's make it three. Oh, hell -- who are we kidding?!? Let's make it 30 DAYS! There we go ... a 30 day paid vaction just like President Bush took just recently. Call it "THE GREAT UNWASHED AMERICAN WALK-OUT!" And when I said PAID vacation, I mean PAID. Either their employers have to pay it and if they refuse, government will just have to dole it out and, Neil, don't tell us the government dosn't have the money. If the Bush Administration can dish out billions upon billions of no-bid government contracts to Halliburton, Shaw Group, and Bechtel and if Sen. Hillary Clinton can blow $100 Million on another stupid and pointless study into violent $50 video games, then it sure as hell has the money to provide 30-days pay for "THE WALK-OUT!"

Do you really want to know the real kicker would be about "THE GREAT UNWASHED AMERICAN WALK-OUT", Neil?!? The hoot, the coup de grace?!? It will be totally spontaneous. It'll happen out of the blue out of nowhere ... sort of like a terrorist attack ... the only difference is we'll be the terrorists. Economic terrorists. Poor and middle class domestic economic terrorists getting even with our own pampered and filthy rich corporate terrorist taskmasters. Just a rolling, concerted, and collective STICKING IT TO THE MAN!

Of course, in order to pull something like this off, we'd need some degree of planning and how's this: The GREAT UNWASHED AMERICAN WALK-OUT will happen immediately after ANY rightwing Conservative pundit, Congressmen, Senator, Governor, or collumnist has the brass the spew what you just spewed.

Now, Mr. Boortz ... You're probably thinking, "What about my freedom of speech?!?!"

Nothing wrong with you having freedom of speech. Anyone can say anything, anywhere, anytime, but again the inverse cost of said freedom is responsibility. Freedom to say anything and everything anywhere at anytime may have consequences, Neil. Yelling "fire" in a crowded theatre has consequences for those irresponsible enough to say it. Standing somewhere in Alabama and singing a certain Megadeth song about keeping the ol' sex life in the family has consequences and most of them involve staggering out of Alabama short a few teeth but plenty of bruises and contusions. Standing up vertically in the middle of Compton and shouting "Nigger" has consequences for those irresponsible enough to say it and most of them involve leaving Compton horizontally.

See, Niel?!? With freedoms comes reponsibility and if you don't want to see THE GREAT UNWASHED AMERICAN WALK-OUT take place, you might want to double check that tongue before giving it a wag.

To that, you might say, "Why, you punk-ass liberals, we conservatives got all the guns and we gots the monopoly on the military!" Not after this clusterfuck of a war, I guarantee you that. I believe our troops are starting to think the GOP takes them for granted, so kiss some military votes goodbye. As for that whole swaggering "we gots all the guns" malarky, we've got something that's even more dangerous and scary to a Republican. It's more intimidating to them that all the guns in the world and more scary for them than getting chased back to their Lexuses and Volvos by a gaggle of small black children.

Do you know what that thing is, Mr. Boortz.

It's a timeclock.

As the forementioned reader of C&L quoted earlier said:

If work was so great, why haven't the rich figured out a way to keep it all for themselves?!?

That's a mighty fine question, Neil -- do you have an answer for it?

posted by Sizemore at 7:35 PM

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